Episode 35: Social InjusticeNon-faith-based versions of Social Justice, versions that advocate identity politics and victimhood, tend to promote division and conflict. Instead of focusing on collaboration, consensus, and unity — they focus on differences.Listen Now
Episode 34: LiesCreative storytelling used to protect self-image differs from lies intended to take advantage of others. Lies that sweeten the conflict narrative and Save Face differ from intentionally destructive lies. Peacemakers must discern the difference. Listen Now
Episode 33: Empathy Not SympathyIn this episode, I want to point out a common trap that awaits peacemakers: Sympathy is often equated with empathy. When peacemakers fail to discern the difference between sympathy and empathy, they get into trouble.Listen Now
Episode 32: Love & Wisdom Part IIWhen peacemakers reconcile relationships they deliver a bonus — people better understand Life. This is especially true when a person’s relationship with God is reconciled. When a loving relationship with God is restored, people gain an ability to see reality at the deepest level possible.Listen Now
Episode 31: Love & Wisdom Part IAs a practical matter, love precedes knowledge. Love comes first. When love is absent, knowledge is absent. At first, this idea may seem strange. Ordinarily, we do not consider that we must first to love something in order to know it. Let’s reflect on how that might be.Listen Now
Episode 30: SinWe must seek a dynamic and operational definition of sin, a definition that integrates with peacemaking. What does that mean? As peacemakers, we seek a definition of sin that focuses on relationship. Sin ends when divine love is brought back into a relationship. People do not cease sinning because they know the rules better. They stop sinning because they want to love more.Listen Now
Episode 29: “I” MessagesOne way we avoid threatening Face is by using “I” messages. These messages describe how a situation or event made you feel. They are your personal, interior accounts of the conflict. Ordinarily, you would make statements that seem to accuse the other person. You might say, “you did this or you did that.” But, now, with an “I” message, you replace the words “you did” with “I felt.”Listen Now
Episode 28: Deception, Part IVPeacemakers probably do not anticipate being called upon to be detectives, but Destructive Hidden Influences make this necessary. Peacemakers must become sleuths in the tradition of Columbo, the television detective.Listen Now
Episode 27: Deception, Part IIIHow does a peacemaker know a Destructive Hidden Influence is at work? Evidence is found in the irrational or illogical fears expressed by parties. Evidence is found in the distrust that lingers when it should have dissipated. Evidence lies in the damaged relationship that is unusually difficult to heal. Fear, distrust, and hostility are signs of a Destructive Hidden Influence. Listen Now
Episode 26: Deception – Part IIIn the previous episode, I introduced Destructive Hidden Influences, covert agents that foster fear and distrust. The prototype was the Serpent, also known as the Deceiver, introduced in Genesis. In this episode I will explore how the Destructive Hidden Influence — the most significant barrier to resolving conflict.Listen Now
Episode 25: Deception – Part IThe first instance of a Destructive Hidden Influence, the prototype we call the Serpent, appears in Genesis. The passage describes the primary source of all conflict. In this mystical lesson we discover what we might call Original Deception. The Serpent models the paradigm of a Destructive Hidden Influence — a covert deceiver who wrecks relationships. Listen Now
Episode 24: ApologyAll too often we do not know how to craft a valid apology. We’re not certain what we should say. An effective apology addresses the primary concern of the wronged party — assurance that “this will not happen again.” Listen Now
Episode 23: Body Soul Duality, Part IIIf I believe I am the Flesh Body and I believe in an After Life, then the Flesh Body must be resurrected. But the belief that the Flesh Body is resurrected is false, incorrect, a widespread faulty belief.Listen Now
Episode 22: Body Soul Duality, Part IAs we study and reflect on scripture, we discover a duality between Flesh Body and Immortal Soul or Spirit. They are not the same thing. The Flesh Body is perishable. It is transitory. Its existence is fleeting. In contrast, an immortal soul — who we are as Divine Self — does not perish. We enjoy eternal life.Listen Now
Episode 21: ExpectationsThere are times when we fully expect to be something or do something or have something — then, when we are denied what we want, we’re ready to fight, ready to go into battle. Disappointed expectations drive us into conflict. Listen Now
Episode 20: False Attribution ErrorWhen we create our inner story, we blame our trespasses on situations, on other people, or even on God. We protect our self-image. When another person crosses the line, we attribute their behavior to bad character, nasty disposition, or evil motives. When we mediate, we uncover missing information and redraft our narrative without false attributions.Listen Now
Episode 19: Face of a FranciscanPeacemakers must become skilled in giving this gift of Divine Face. They will want to turn to the example of Francis who spent the entire night in prayer before he traveled to meet the besieged people of Gubbio, where he tamed the fierce wolf with his prayerful presence.Listen Now
Episode 18: Authority, Rights, InterestsIn Matthew 18:15 we read: “If your brother sins (against you), go and tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won over your brother.” This passage advises us to take a conciliatory approach. Listen Now
Episode 17: Dear BishopsThe bishops meet again next month to reflect further on the path forward beyond the scandals destroying trust in the Catholic Church. With that in mind, I would like to offer the following suggestion for their consideration.Listen Now
Episode 16: God is LoveImmortal souls immersed in Divine Love are drawn into divine relationship. And, ultimately, this unity of “Being-In-Love” is what makes peacemaking possible.Listen Now
Episode 15: Divine CollaborationIn a faith-based approach, we expand the collaboration model. We not only seek to satisfy our interests and the interests of the other party, we also seek to satisfy God’s interests — typically referred to as “the Will of God.”Listen Now
Episode 14: Sculpting False SelfAll conflict is the result of one False Self becoming entangled in opposition to another False Self. Each False Self is comprised of ego traits and swirling clouds of intentions desires. There is one way to de-escalate conflict: Vanish the clusters of False Self traits. Peace arrives after we scrub away ego personality. Listen Now
Episode 13: WorldviewsPeacemakers encounter a clash of two primary worldviews: The dominant secular culture advances Materialism. The other worldview, a spiritual worldview, rests on the philosophy of Idealism.Listen Now
Episode 12: The OmbudspersonLarge institutions, such as universities, typically employ ombudspersons. But the Catholic Church lacks such a program. Listen Now
Episode 11: Celebrating the IncarnationAt Christmas we celebrate not only the birth of the baby Jesus, but also a major supernatural event — the Incarnation. Caught up in celebrating the birth, we forget to reflect on the Incarnation, on the idea expressed in John 1:14, “And the Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us…”Listen Now
Episode 10: Tribalism & TheologyPeacemakers must offset destructive Catholic tribalism by promoting widespread catechism in Benedict XVI's theology of relationship.Listen Now
Episode 9: Habitual Responses to ConflictThe False Self brings about habitual responses to conflict. Thus, for us to reconcile we must strip away the False Self, a cluster of destructive ego traits. Listen Now
Episode 8: The False SelfAll conflicts are the result of two or more False Selves becoming entangled in opposing intentions. The False Self is a cluster of ego traits that do not reflect divine nature. In spiritual direction we sculpt away the layers of false self that taint our interests.Listen Now
Episode 7: Going Below the LineWhen you find yourself managing a conflict, slow up and ask the question — what do people really want? What interest are they really trying to satisfy? Do I really know what they want? Listen Now
Episode 6: Spiritual Direction, An IntroductionSpiritual direction, an ancient tradition, focuses on reconciling relationships with God. Catholic spiritual direction seeks to bring about mystical union with Christ.Listen Now
Episode 5: Pastoral CounselingPastoral counseling clears away personal emotional, mental, and spiritual barriers to reconciliation. Pastoral counselors see man as an immortal soul, In order to serve the faithful, the Catholic Church must greatly expand its delivery of pastoral counseling.Listen Now
Episode 4: Mediation Part II, A Faith-Based ApproachIn faith-based mediation, when a person reconciles with God, their human relationships improve. When a person reconciles human relationships, their relationship with God improves. Secular models, however, dismiss the fundamental relationship between Man and God. Listen Now
Episode 3: Mediation Part I, The BasicsMediation is the art of restoring harmony in the presence of the Holy Spirit. It is a practice found in the Gospel of Matthew, Chapter 18:15-18. Listen Now
Episode 2: The Assisi Option, an IntroductionThe Assisi Option addresses the clash between people of faith and a secular culture. It calls for the creation of spiritual direction…Listen Now
Episode 1: Peace Be With You, An IntroductionPeople hunger for peace but they are surrounded by conflict and suffering. In response, Peace Be With You explores…Listen Now